Tuesday, January 18, 2011

April Conference Surprise

There will be four impostors speaking at the General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in April. Two of them will speak in the first Session, then one in the Priesthood Meeting Saturday evening, and the final one will address you Sunday morning. You must not heed the words they read.

The other speakers will repeat previously spoken bland material, with very slight modifications.

I will unmask those four impostors, and their sins, the day before Conference begins. The Church will not remove them from the speaker line up. Church authorities think I am insane.

Just as the Pharisees did in my days of old.

Listen carefully to the real Super Hero. He will sell his soul for popularity. He will mention me in his address, and will urge you to not visit the blog again. This will be a grave mistake if you follow his counsel.

This blog will save some 34 million families by mid-May.

To discourage reading the tips herein is evil.

Just as looking up to the staff of Aaron gave miraculous power, so too will keeping your teapot spouts pointing to the East make your homes safe from the killings that are coming to Zion.

I am not only the oldest Southwest Airline pilot who made the pages of yesterdays newspapers, I am also one who cares about you, and your families.

If you doubt my simple words, you will die.

The very foundations of Zion will shake until there is not one stone left atop another on Temple Square.

My words shall cause the dissolution of the whore of all the earth. This, to save the meek among you from further oppressions.

Then Mormons will cease to worship their many idols.

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